Frequently I get new clients who tell me they have been sitting on my card for several months; one client for a year. They tell me how many times they’ve almost called to set up an appointment. I can’t help but think, what makes therapy so scary? I know that for some, the issue is financial. Therapy is expensive, and many aren’t in a place where they can afford it. I can respect that.

But when finances aren’t an issue, I ask myself, what are the other obstacles? I see many clients in the evenings, and am at my office all day, with the intention of being available for a day and time that works for them. So let’s eliminate scheduling from the equation, as well.

Then there’s stigma. What will people think? Why do people have to know? While I don’t believe that taking care of one’s mental health ought to have any more stigma surrounding it than going to the doctor for a physical, the fact is that it does. So if stigma is the issue, then my thought would be “just don’t tell people”. I have lots more to say on this but that is a post for a different time.

But let’s presume stigma is not the concern. This brings me back to my initial question…why is it so damn scary? We go to the gym to change ourselves, improve ourselves, or maintain a level of fitness and health we’ve worked hard to achieve. And for those of us that are in the “wanting to change” stage, I’m guessing it doesn’t take a year to sign up for a membership. Most people want to get started right away. They don’t want to live one more day in a body they aren’t happy with. Even though it can be intimidating thinking of the uphill battle. Or the people in the gym that look like you want to look. When I go to the gym, some days I find those people motivating; other days, depressing. But I get up. And I go. Day in and day out. I go. I have a goal and I’m dedicated to achieving it. And when I feel like I’ve hit it, I’ll be dedicated to maintaining it. But with mental health, it just isn’t so for people.

It can be scary to think about facing our demons. Many of us do a great job of sweeping things under the rug. It is a coping skill, and in some ways, it works. I don’t like to sit and stew in my garbage, either, but if I never took my trash out, my kitchen would look like something you see on TLC.

To me, therapy is just that; it’s taking out the trash. It’s being proactive so we don’t let our crap pile up on us. And for those of us that have let it pile too high, and see it spilling over into other areas of the house, it’s being reactive and taking it out…eventually. But it’s movement. It’s change.

For some people, change is scary. And I get that too. But for me, looking into a future that looks a lot like a past I’ve been desperate to escape feels way more daunting.